Christmas Presence

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What do you really want for Christmas…?

What can you offer others that they will truly  value…?

We just want to be happy!
As human beings we are undeniably attracted to material possessions.  Christmas time is typically when we get to celebrate and fully indulge this attraction.  After-all, who doesn’t like receiving a present?  We like it because it ‘makes us happy’.  There is a pleasure in receiving, in acquiring and possessing something we want.  We equate this pleasure with happiness. I want the new car, because it will make me happy.
It is in fact this happiness that we truly desire. The car is simply a means to an end.
It doesn’t take much self-enquiry to discover that what we truly seek is happiness. In my work as a coach most people express to me that what they long for most is to to feel at peace, to feel loved, to be free.  We don’t have to look far to see this is a common longing for all human beings.  Just listen to the lyrics of the carols we sing at Christmas time.  The songs talk of  ‘peace on earth’, ‘goodwill to humankind’, ‘joy to the world’.  Clearly  we are moved by and are attracted to these ideals – we could say that they speak to us.

 

Meditation assists us to be happy

Meditation is a way we can actually access and experience these ideals in a very real, practical and profound way. Joy, happiness and peace emerge naturally as we slow down, relax and learn to be with ourselves just as we are.  This happens automatically as we become more present.
In meditation, instead of rushing around being busy, looking for the next thing, we simply stop and be here now.  Of course our minds tend to still run off, thinking of the past and thinking of the future.  That is fine though.  We are able to gently bring ourselves back to here and now using the body or the breath as an anchor.

Being present
Meditation confronts our habit of ‘living in the future’ – of rushing and striving to get to a place (or obtain an object) that will finally grant us the happiness or peace we have been looking for.  When we first stop we feel the  consequences of living ‘in the future’.  We notice how living in this way creates feelings of disconnection, loneliness and isolation.  We see and feel the superficiality, flatness, lack of meaning, and deadening that is part and parcel living a rushed, driven life.  This can be very disconcerting.and painful to feel and see. Certainly I find it to be this way!

Most people don’t even go there (because of this pain).   They remain busy, rushed, preoccupied.  There is a huge pay-off though for those of us willing to stop, to rest and to feel. Because beneath the initial discomfort and unease, something far truer and profound starts to be revealed…

The tangible results
The recurring thoughts and concerns that may have bothered us before, lose their power and fade. We relax, and we feel better. We fell happier, more at peace, more joyful.

We can feel warm inside.  The world changes – sounds appear clearer, colours brighter, smells stronger.  What seemed previously to be boundaries between self and others vanish – there is more connection. We notice more space around us and also within our consciousness.  It is like we have arrived somewhere new and are seeing things for the first time.  It is a common experience to feel like we have come home.  And we have come home, to the present moment, and to our true self.
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Presence as a gift to others

This presence then becomes a gift for others.  Because when we are present we become available for those around us.   As we are unguarded, so others become unguarded with us.  As we relax, those in our company relax.  As we open, they open.  We feel a genuine connection to those we are encountering.

This allows us to see and appreciate those around us for who they really are.  We see that they are not the ‘image’ we had of them in our head.    We don’t need to change them , or get our own point of view across to them.  We can appreciate them just as they are.   We give them the space to be the the vibrant, loving, amazing beings we all are.

This is a wonderful thing to experience and a beautiful gift to be able to offer ourselves and those around us.  It is the best ever possible Christmas gift.  Don’t believe me though. Test it for yourself and see what happens!

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